HELLO!!! ARE You Listening To Life's Lessons?

Have you ever experienced something so intense that you felt you could do nothing else before you shared it?  To send a message in hopes at least one person could receive that message just as strongly as you did?
Obviously, that happened to me.  Just about an hour ago.  So, here I am, forsaking what ever else logic is dictating I should do, knowing that this will be another late night fulfilling responsibilities in other areas of my life. 

That's okay.  I'm alright with that for if I do not get this out of my system, anything I do today will be done half-a@@.  I am virtually being pushed to getting this done, and I feel good about it, come what may.

With that out the way, let me add this disclaimer:  I will be directing you to another site in order to listen to a program.  The person responsible for it, I feel, though we have never met in person, is a dear friend of mine, one whom came into my life by divine intervention.  I may get into that another time, but I will say he has helped get me through some of my darkest days of despair.  Anyway, my point is, I am not a paid sponsor.  I also do not get any kind of kickback via an affiliate service.  Heck, my website is so new, most search engines do not know it  even exists.  But that is not why I created this site anyway.  This is a labor of love.

Now that you have that information, I hope you read on.

There is a man, DennisJ (DJ), who has created a site called "The Adult Church."  I believe God is using him as a tool to let those who are lost, hurting, confused, "fill in the blank," to know He is there, that He has your back; the only caveat is that you must be willing to want to have a relationship with Him, to let Him in your life so to speak. 

I believe the crap in this life is of man (woman, too), is of this world.  Are you familiar with the Great Fall of man?  <== Click on that for the biblical background.  Anyway, that's the situation we are in.  But, as Jim Rohn once said,  “You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself.”

If you are one to ignore reviews of movies, books, restaurants, and want to experience it yourself first, then by all means jump right in: 
                                     Lessons Learned  How to Get From Here . . . To Where You Always Wanted to Be.
Things to know beforehand:

• It's about an hour long.  To really hear the message, please don't be doing another activity that engages your brain.   I tried to write up a paper once at the same time, and let me tell you, DJ's entire program was lost on me.
• This is not a "Burn In Hell" lecture.  It's not a "Nothing Bad Will Ever Happen To You Once You Accept Jesus" message either.  It's whatever you get out of it.  
• All of his shows come from his own experience.  No need to get defensive and think, "What gives him the right to tell me 'xyz?!'"
• DJ believes in the power of music.  He is led to find just the right song, whether it is secular or not.  For example, his "musical guests" for the current program is Sarah Brightman, Coldplay, Rose Royce, Ozzy Ozbourne, Boston, Michael O'Brien, Bachman-Turner Overdrive and RATT.
• It is FREE.  No donations, no tithing, no exclusive membership with a fee.  DJ's mission is also a labor of love.  He is being directed by the sovereign will of God.

If you do leave here to go listen now, I would love to read your review, what message you received.  Come back and feel free to add your comments to this blog.  If you want to know first about my experience, the message I received, please read on....

DJ states the person most at peace is the one who deals with the blows by addressing it directly, having the faith she will get through it, accepting and acting on a plan that will get her out of the valley.  The life's lesson realized will be born from whatever mistake or decision that led to being in the valley.  It might be a decision made by some one else in your life that got you to this time of despair; in other words, something out of your control.   Socrates once mused, "The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." 

You may have areas in your life that are at peace; but, as DJ tells you in the message, the areas that are not at peace, your areas of despair, of hurt, of hopelessness is where God is needing you to hear Him.  He knows your pain and suffering.  Didn't He not send his Son to the world to take on all our sins, all the suffering?  Jesus went through physical and emotional torment for us.  (John 3:16 {KJV}). 

The change you need to make may not be pretty or easy to come by, or even seem logical.  But if it is the path you need to take, the one God is leading you to, the path will feel right; it will bring peace to your mind, heart and soul no matter how hard the climb out of the valley is.  You are doing what needs to be done, you are "taking care of business." <== This is one of songs DJ uses in the program.  Fits, doesn't it?

Your valley may have you screaming, "WHY ME?!"  I will not give you my entire life's story (that could get boring rather quickly), but it seems appropriate to give you one of the stories so you will know I emphatically understand that feeling: 

When my Dad passed away a few years back, it was not an easy death.  He had been in and out of the hospital, in the last stages of an incurable cancer that spread.  The night before his last day on earth (unbeknownst to be that it was to be his last), I knew I had to visit him early in the morning.  It was a Saturday, and had made plans to be with my family that day for I had spent so much time from them, helping both my Dad and Mom for the past few months.  But I felt a push-and-pull to see Dad.  So, at 4:00am, I drove the 40 minutes it took to get to the hospital.  At that point, Dad was in the ICU again for he had been having problems with his blood pressure and bleeding.  Before I entered his room, though it was dark, I could see his bed was raised somewhat and he was awake.  I stopped when I saw a darkness on his hospital gown, near his neck.  I knew he could see me, but he could not speak.  It just took seconds for me to realize he was bleeding out and choking.  The ICU doctor was just outside the room next to his and I waved to get this attention to come to the room.  Something kept me from showing my panic; I knew my Dad would be able to see it for his eyes were adjusted to the dark.  The doctor came, I whispered what I believed was happening.  The doctor turned on the room's lights, confirming it.  As he pulled back the sheets while simultaneously calling for a nurse, the bleeding was not limited to coming up through his throat.  As they prepared to do what they needed to do to stop him from choking, I helped clean him up. 

Just the day before, Dad, Mom, my brother and I agreed to have the doctor perform a procedure to determine where he was bleeding from internally and stopping it to extend his life.  But, now, there was no hope that could be done.  It was time for comfort measures, and though my Dad had decided and written what his wishes were concerning life sustaining measures, I was asked to confirm to just make him as comfortable as can be.  I had to make the horrible decision to agree, but told the doctor I was going to be the one to tell Dad.  When I did, Dad told me with his eyes ~ he was unable to speak ~ that he knew it already, and let me know it was okay.  I left to call my brother, and to bring my mom to the hospital.  By God's and my Dad's will, he was able to hold on until we returned.  As God as my witness, I could not bear the thought of him dying alone.  Dad was never able to speak again, and as the monitors displayed the slowing down of his heart and breathing, my Mom and I held on to him, comforting him, letting him know to not be afraid, it was okay to leave to go to his Heavenly home. 

In the days, weeks, months, even years after, I anguished over why did it have to be me that had to be there to make that decision?  Why did I have to be the one to see him bleeding out?  I felt so guilty about thinking those thoughts for it seemed selfish to do so.  I told no one in detail what happened and of my despair because of the shame I imposed on myself.  I did not reach out to God; that feeling stayed me so long that it became part of me.  I thought I deserved it. 

I did not find peace until this year.   I finally listened to something God was trying to convey to me for a long time.  By doing so, I finally understood why.  And it also made me realize I still had been carrying around another "anguish," burying it so deep it had become part of my character.

A few years before my Dad passed, I had gone through a fight for my life.  After the birth of my last child, after thirteen weeks in the hospital for complications, I was hemorrhaging internally in the recovery room though it was not realized for almost two hours.  Once the epidural for the c-section I had to have began to wear off, I started experiencing excruciating pain.  At the same time, I kept losing blood pressure, staying just above consciousness. 
Not sure of the source, I was not allowed pain medication.  The nurse called in an anesthesiologist  who watched my pressure and injected me with some sort of medicine each time I started to pass out.  I felt he was my life line as they continued to take my blood for tests.  At some point, that 'life line' had to leave for he was paged to attend another delivery.  Except for the nurse at the station in front of me, I was now alone.  I do not know who was in the other beds for there were curtains pulled closed to the right and left of me.  It wasn't long before I felt myself going down, so to speak, again.  I literally  felt like the life as draining from me.  I called out to the nurse as loud as I could - which was not much for I was losing strength to speak.  She informed me she did not have authority to administer whatever drug was being given to rev up my system.  She paged someone to come.  During the time it took another one to help me,  I fought for my life.  I prayed for strength, I talked to myself aloud to stay awake, to hold on, for I knew that if I did not stay awake, I would never wake up again.  I let myself cry for doing so kept me alert.  My head swooned, and I fought. 

To this day, considering how long it took the staff to realize I was bleeding internally (when I was brought back into surgery, I ended up receiving five pints of blood),  I know God had not intended it to be my time to go home to Him.  With His help, I drew on a strength that we all have in our souls but may never have to access.  I do not know how long it took for help - it seemed like a lifetime that I was at death's door - but help did come.  After not even being able to get blood even from my foot, they finally paged my doctor who fortunately just lived ten minutes away.  She was livid when she was told how long I had been like this, and when I told her I was really scared, she told me she was as well.  They got my then-husband from the NICU (our son was having breathing problems and had not opened his eyes until his Dad was whisked out of the room by a nurse to let him know), and I tried to think of what all I should say to him if I wasn't coming back.  Let me tell you, it does not happen like in movies and t.v. shows.  All I could say was that I loved him so very much, and to tell our children (we had three now) that I loved them and was so proud of them.  That was the moment he got scared that I was going to die.   Suffice it to say, after three hours in the operating room, I did not die (Go ahead and say it, I know you want to:   "Thank you, Captain Obvious.   I couldn't figure that out on my own").

One more thing to impart about the experience - as I was being whisked away to surgery, I swear to this day we went by the waiting area and I saw my Mom and Dad (they had just returned after getting dinner,and seen the shape I was in).  I was awake for the drug was being administered to me again to keep my blood pressure up.   My parents stood up, had them stop rolling the gurney and came up to me.  They smiled, telling me it was going to be okay and they would not leave, they would be by my side when I came back. When that happened, my fear dissipated and I felt at peace.   However, both of them denied this ever took place, that they did not see me until I got out of surgery.    Most would chalk this up as a delusion, but I know in my heart it was something else, something much greater than all of us.  Being human, though, later I wondered why I "had" to go through that.  My prior two pregnancies were fraught with other issues, so why couldn't my last be 'normal?'  Why? Why? Why?  But I tucked that away, too, and it became a simmering anger, that bled into a pessimistic outlook on life.

Fast forward to this year.  Something else happened that caused me to stop and finally get peace with both events, and make a change within myself to be able to get out of the valley I have been in.  I realized that my personal experience helped me help my Dad.  I knew intimately at the moment I saw him in his hospital bed how it felt to have the life draining out of him.  To be utterly alone, to not be able to get help.  The difference was he could not speak.  No one could see him.  He did not have the strength to find the nurse's button. 
I knew that fear.  If I had not experienced that exact same thing, I would have fallen apart.  I would not have been able to do all that I could to comfort him, to make "the decision," to tell him that there was nothing left the doctors could do, to drive to my Mom's and get her to the hospital.  I also know that if I had not come at that time in the morning, if I had not paid attention to that push-pull to be there when I did, my Dad would have died alone without his loved ones by his side.  I was not aware of it during my Dad's passing, obviously, but I actually learned something valuable from of the most frightening times in my life and was able to act upon it by helping him to reach peace before he had to leave us.  This has changed me immensely.

Am I saying that God had me almost die on purpose when my last child was born?  No!
I am saying that God wanted me to use what I went through to help my Dad.  There were times that people came into my life afterwards that I see now would have helped me listen, and understand that.  I would have not been so mired in hurt and bitterness for I have made mistakes in my life since because I made decisions based on that hurt and bitterness.  Even after my own  skirmish with death, there were people that tried to lead me away from the pessimistic outlook I had created.  I refused, choosing instead to not change, and thus taking paths based on that outlook. 

So, here I am today, thanks to listening to DJ, telling you that there are lessons from life that God wants you to use.  It can help bring peace to that part of your life you are struggling with so you can listen, understand the change that needs to take place, and, with God's help, act upon that understanding. 

I will end this long post with one more message that I got out of DJ's program.  Part of that help God is here to do, is to try and help "fix you."  'Try' because he can't do it alone - He needs your help.
DJ uses a song done by Cold Play to drive that message home, appropriately titled "Fix You." 
Like DJ instructs, replace "I" with "God."  

                                                                       Trust Him.  Just reach out.  Don't be afraid.
                                          He can help fix you, help you change, help you walk the path out of the valley.
                                                                  Let it go,  Let it be.  Move forward.  He's waiting.
                                                                                                  Be at peace.